“The high is better than heroine” – Anonymous client, re: giving his time to others
As a therapist who works in a private practice, I have encountered the mentally ill and substance abusers in the guise of convicted felons, parolees, average joes, and the elite. Being out of grad school for only eight months, I am already beginning to reap the rewards of the interaction commonly referred to as “The therapeutic relationship.” Many clients have inadvertently inspired me in a way I never thought they would, and have done so through the sharing of their selfless experiences. Now, assuming generalizations from the specifics of each client’s case would be like bringing together thirty differing instruments of varying make, tone, pitch, and intensity to create harmony. Yet, somehow it works. To some conductors it just makes sense, and the end result is often an orchestra exuding such power and such awe-inspiring beauty that it can bring tears to the human eye. If I am this conductor, my clients’ experiences are those instruments, and the harmonious, awe-inspiring product is the conclusion that each of their cathartic experiences shares a common bond – altruism.
And this is what I intend to do in these blogs – to bring together the numerous experiences of the therapy-engaging individual and explore the healing power of selflessness. So, not only have I just begun a paragraph with the word “and” (which, mind you, is grammatically acceptable under emphatic circumstances), but I am also about to make one of those generalizations that scientists often abhor: replace your fear, anxiety, or drug of choice with altruism, and reap the intrinsic benefits.
The term ‘benefit’ is used hesitantly because, by definition, an altruistic person neither seeks nor desires any reward. These “rewards,” though, present themselves nonetheless; in the form of contentment, inner peace, or any other endorphin-eliciting word you wish to insert. This is not to say that my clients are all clean, avoiding relapse, and righting the wrongs they have enacted in their drug-induced stupor. What I am saying is that there is a common thread amongst those who have found happiness outside of their addictions, and this binding factor can inevitably be traced to altruistic roots.
It is obvious there is a correlation between the successful cessation of a drug addiction and altruism. The questions about the nature or even the causal factors of their cathartic relationship, though, may never be clearly understood. Regardless, the result is divine, inspirational, and real. I cannot deny that the relationship exists because it presents itself each week in my hourly sessions, and that is what I am here to both describe and openly explore. I wish to inspire others as my clients have inspired me. If the world could so much as glimpse the true happiness and natural high that my clients express to – and, in turn, elicit in – me, perhaps altruism or selflessness could take an even greater step forward in the hearts of man and help to ignite unity and peace in a world where violence, hatred, and fear permeate our very core.
I intend each week to explore different facets and presentations of altruism in the clinical setting: its causes, its effects, the elements behind its transformational power, and its unwavering presence amidst the healing process in both the mentally ill and substance abusing patient. I invite you to comment and join me in this venture because, truthfully, I do not have the answers. What works for one person may not necessarily work for another. It takes creativity and self-control to even begin this healing process. Theories will be conjured and assessed, experiences will be shared and explored, and readers will undoubtedly be inspired to ‘pay it forward.’ The application of our discussions, however, is up to the individual.
“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Ghandi
Jordan M. Nacht, Mental Health Counselor
First Light Psychological
Farmingdale, NY
Cell - (954)-614-9943
[...] read his opening / introductory post – Changing the World Through Altruism on his blog – Awaken Yourself Today, Sleep When You’re Dead; Perspectives on [...]
As always I enjoyed and agree with what you had to say on your blog. How true, we will get plenty of sleep when we head off for that long dirt nap. Looking for to you next entry.
I have chosen a new profession where in the mind of most people, is a profession filled with “salesmen”. Since many outside my profession and my experience see “salesman” as some sort of malevolent low life, I will stop describing my new position at this moment and leave the reader to their own imagination. Many or I should say the majority of my potential customers are beyond my ability to help them. I try to find a positive aspect to their situation and always leave them with not only a smile, but also information that they can use to help themselves. I have always been an information junkie and it is in this new profession I am able to use that information for the betterment of others.
My thoughts spring from an appointment yesterday with an elderly woman who I called some months ago. Unbeknownst to me, she had turned down other appointments waiting for me to call her and set up an appointment. “Something in your voice” she said told me, “to wait for you to call me back” after her return home, from caring for a relative in another state. She lives with her daughter and both people are of simple minds and means. When we met, she said, “you speak slowly and listen, I like that”. She desperately needed my help as I later ascertained, but before we got started, as I am an artist, in addition to my other avocations, we spoke about her absent daughter. Her daughter it seems is a frustrated artist herself and her mother recognizing that frustration, seized upon the opportunity to show me the scrapbooks she creates. We must have spent the better part of the first hour looking through various creations. When the time came, to get down to “business” and I started to ask about her life and her situation, she was relaxed and found the peace of mind for the tasks at hand. She thought about things she had long forgotten, and we were able to uncover and discover ways she and I could use to help her.
I am in therapy now for reasons that are not germane to this piece, however, if I had not been given, the opportunity for therapy, I would not have been as sensitive to the need to just listen and not prejudge a situation or person. I think many in my profession might have packed their bags and walked out soon after meeting this woman and observing her situation. However, I was fresh from a session the night before and was thinking of the kindness I was, and have been shown that allowed me to step into her shoes.
If I was she, and I met me, and was presented with the smile and genuine interest I had shown to her, I would have acted as she did. Unafraid, meeting a stranger, who had her best interests at heart, I say thank you for restoring my vision. A single deed, which will multiply into many, in now, unforeseen ways.